JUST FOR FUN (JOKES-VILLE) AJEBOTA OR AJEPAKI... WAYS TO MAKE THE DETERMINATION

*If you step on nail and you bleeds, you might be ‘BOTA, but if you step on nail and BEND IT, you are PAKI!

*If you see words like Madam, Sir or Esq.  After your folks name, you might be Ajebota, but if people refer to your folks as either Iya-kudi, baa Lamidi, Mama Chukwudi, you are Ajepaki.

*If you have your home periodically fumigated with scentless pest repellents, so it’s virtually roach and termite free, you might be Ajebota, but if you aim with either your slippers or scandals to nail a flying cockroach to a wall, you are Ajepaki.

*If your folks carry wallets and purses, you are possible an Ajebota, but if your mom reaches into her bra to get money in the glaring eyes of the public, your PAKI-ness is level 5!

* If you have a borehole installed in your compound for regular water supply, you might be an Ajebota; but if either you are so used to “kanga” irrigation system or the middle of your head is hairless due to having logged over 1,000 miles from hauling pails of water, you are definitely PAKI!

* If after using the bathroom, you have an assorted barrage of scented toilet tissues to choose from, you just might be Ajebota; but if you still use water to “tamba” yourself, you are Ajepaki.

* If you brush, rinse, gargle and floss, you might be an Ajebota; but if, after chewing your Pako, you can spit the pako paste 40 yards; your PAKI-ness is considered level 8!

* If as a man you have underwear that has the elastic band at the waistline, you could be an Ajebota; but if your underwear looks like Flag of Ghana and has drawstring, you are definitely PAKI!

* If your home has sophisticated theft deterrent systems like barbed-wires, dogs, CCTV camera and an alarm system, you might be an Ajebota; but if people scared to either move closer or scale your fence because your folks having installed a “shigidi”(or whatever that is ..) you are Ajepaki.

* If you go to hair salon in Naija to do your hair, you might be an Ajebota; but if you “Onidiri” sit you down for 4 hours on an “apoti” under a tree while she did your hair, you are a PAKI.

* If you usually use cotton buds to clean your ears regularly, you just might be an Ajebota, but if use chicken feather or “owu elepo” you are Ajepaki.

* If you armpit is hair-free and being scented regularly with deodorant or anti-perspirant cream, you might be an Ajebota; but if you armpit is bushy and oozing odoriferous odour, your PAKI- ness is level 9!

* If at home, you are using gas cooker, rechargeables as well as generator, you might be an Ajebota but if you still resort to “ARO”(3 stones) and “fitila elepo”(local lamp that use wool and palm oil) you are Ajepaki.

* Finally, if you and your mate knows what foreplay, means, you might be an Ajebota, but if you try foreplay with your woman and she replies impatiently “Akimu, joo se nte se, e ye fi ori omu mi si e (Akeem, do what you wanted to do quickly and stop playing with my tits), you are a PAKI level 10.

GENIUS BOY

  Aunty Kate was having a problem with one SS1 boy Sam, he said "I should be in SS3, I'm smarter than some blokes in SS3 .Aunt Kate have had enough of Sam complain and took him to the principal, who decided to test him with some question ss3 student should know; principal- what is square root of 144 ?

 Sam-12,

Principal -what is a score?

 Sam - 20.

The principal agreed that Sam should be promoted to SS 3. But Aunty Kate is not convinced and decided to ask Sam the following questions......

Aunty Kate- What does a cow have 4 but I have only 2 of? 

 Sam: Legs. 

Aunty Kate- what is in your pants that you have that I don't have (principal mouth opens...)

 Sam: Pockets. 

Aunty Kate- What start with letter C and end with letter T, hairy, oval, delicious and contain thin whitish liquid (principal eyes open wildly, but b4 he could stop d answer...) 

Sam: (calmly) Coconut.

Aunty Kate- What goes in hard, and pink but comes out soft and sticky (Principal now sweating profusely  ...)

Sam: Bubble gum.

Aunty Kate- You sticks your poles inside me, you tie me down, to get me up, I get wet before you do

 Sam: Tent. 

Aunty Kate- A finger goes in me, you fiddle with me when you are bored, and the best man always has me, (principal now visibly shaken...)

Sam: Wedding ring. 

Aunty Kate: I come in many sizes, when I'm not well, I drip, and when u blows me I feel good

Sam: Nose.

Aunt Kate: I have a stiff shaft, my tip penetrates, I came with a quiver.( principal blinking and gulping )

Sam: Arrow. 

Aunty Kate: What start with letter F and end with letter K if you don't have it, you have to use your hand

Sam: Fork.

Aunty Kate - What is it that all men have, its longer in some men than others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after marriage (principal is nearly paralysed with fear...)

Sam (composed): Surname.

Aunty Kate - What part of man has no bone, but has muscles, with a lot of veins like pumping, and it’s responsible for making love (aha...this is it, d principal thought, half sat up in his seat, tensed  ...)

Sam: Heart. 
 

The principal (soaked in his own sweat) breathe a sigh of huge relief and said to Aunty Kate, make sure you send the boy to University, I myself got the last 10 question wrong (only first one ) Genius!!!