EXAMPLE OF TRAGEDY....LAUGH IT OFF!

Winston Peters is visiting a school. In one class, he asks the students “if anyone can give him an example of TRAGEDY”. One boy stands up and offers that “if my best friend who lives next door was playing in the street when a car came along and killed him, that would be a tragedy” NO!

Winston said, that would be an ACCIDENT. A girl raises her hand “if a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved that would be a tragedy”. I am afraid not, Winston said, that would be a GREAT LOSS.

The room is silent, none of other children volunteer. What? Asked Winston, isn’t there anyone here who can give me an example of tragedy? Finally, a boy in the back raises his hand, in a timid voice, he says “if an airplane carrying Winston Peters was blown up by a bomb, which would be a tragedy....”  “Wonderful! Winston beams Marvelous! And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?” well, says the boy, because it wouldn’t be an ACCIDENT and it certainly wouldn’t be a GREAT LOSS.

POLITICS

Lil Johnny goes to his Dad and asks “what is politics?” Dad says, well son, let me try to explain it this way; I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me CAPITALISM. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we will call her the GOVERNMENT. We are here to take care of your need, so we will call you THE PEOPLE. The nanny, well, considers her the WORKING CLASS. Your baby brothers, well, call him the FUTURE. Now go and think about this and see if it makes sense “.

So, Johnny goes off to bed, thinking about what dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled, so he goes to his parent’s room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny‘s room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny, and he gives up and went back to bed.

The next morning, Lil Johnny goes to his father, “dad, I think I understand what politics is now”. Good son, now tell me in your own words then what politics is. Lil Johnny replies, “Well, while CAPITALISM is screwing the WORKING CLASS, the Government is sound asleep, the PEOPLE are being ignored and THE FUTURE is in deep shit”

POLITICS FOR BEGINNERS

SOCIALISM:  You have 2 cows; the government takes them and give you the milk

COMMUNISM: You have 2 cows; the government takes them and sell the milk to you.

NAZISM: You have 2 cows; the government takes them and shot you.

CAPITALISM: You have 2 cows; you sell one and buy a bull.

FASCISM: You have 2 cows; the government takes both, and hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

ANARCHISM: You have 2 cows; you keep them and steal another one, ignore the government.

DEMOCRACY: You have 2 cows: your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY: You have 2 cows; the government take them from you, shoot one, milk the other and threw the milk away.

MORALS: Don’t have anything to do with cows, they only bring troubles.